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Tuesday, July 13, 2010


This post represented a significant, to me at least, milestone in that my journal writing briefly caught up to real time, and I was no longer using my severely underpowered means of recollection as source material. In writing this I'm sitting chair-side watching Lora take the 3rd dose (1st cycle) of Dacogen brand decitabine. The first two days went smoothly, with no noticeable effects. Following the first dose, we both actually slept better than most recent nights. Parially from the exhaustion from hellday, I imagine, and partially from the relief of finally beginning treatment. Previously, Dr. Steensma had eloquently described chemo as generally "anti-climactic". During a therapy this week we had the pleasure of meeting "Dottie", a 92 year old bird with a charm that would smash the golden girls on their best day. She repeatedly asks why she's here, eliciting the same responses from every staff member in the building. I watched her full-on grope herself, both breasts and exclaim "I think one is bigger than the other, is that why I'm here!?!" She's a delight to have around, as the entire normally docile crowd bursts into laughter with each quip. It's nice to have a break from serious thought, although, I am beginning to realize changes in the way I look at things in my life and day to day. Looking at these bags of chemicals, my mind given time to wander, I think about the hours and days of the ppl who mixed it, and put it in the bag, and prior to that chemical engineers and scientists who identified, tested and developed it into the FDA approved product that it is today. I also wonder what it's doing to Lora, and is it working?

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